Tuesday, March 29, 2011

NOTHING is impossible with God!

I do not say "Nothing is impossible with God" flippantly, but with great conviction.  I believe this to be true with every piece of my being.  We hold onto this truth as we continue to take baby steps ahead.  Yesterday a mountain was scaled as our number arrived but... as every good hiker knows there are valleys between the mountain peaks.  So we are back to our trek today with miles to go; waiting with great anticipation to see just what God will do.     

Monday, March 28, 2011

There is movement!!

Well we finally got our number today; meaning that homeland security has said you are all cleared and can go.  Praise the Lord!  Now it gets fed-exed to South America.  Once recieved we have a 30 day block for clearance.  We are moving!

Friday, March 25, 2011

There is lots to celebrate as we wait!

One step closer

Well a new day has come into full view and we know nothing about what is happening on the other side.  We haven't heard a single word in a week.  But just maybe we are growing one step closer in seeing this as God would have us see it.  i don't know the answers... i am not expected to.  i don't know what is next... i am not expected to.  i don't even know what to do next... i am not expected to.  i am to abide in Him, to love Him more and through that love others... that is all i am really capable of. 

What God is teaching me through this all is humbling and incredibly life changing.  I have been blessed way beyond what i deserve and well beyond what i can even understand.  As i look around me sitting here in my house, typing on my computer - i am awed by God's goodness, yet reflective as i hold God's Word in my lap.  I never want to fall short of His commands, His calling, of acting out on His heart.  Where there is much blessing, much is expected.  I don't know if i have ever allowed that to sink in as deep as it should until recently.  Why?  Well if i was REALLY Truthful...  i really don't want to be challenged on my comforts.  We have a pretty good set up here...  and by all worldly standards if its not broken why fix it.  That all worked for me until a year ago in a little orphanage many miles away. 

And since that very day God has been breaking every piece of pretense in me.  Every thought, every motive, every behavior has been challenged.  As i place each one before scripture i find some lacking places in my walk with the Lord.  See i am really good at wanting to "Know Him more" until it takes me outside the walls of my comforts.  As i pray for revival... God continues to point it back at me.  As i pray for believers to take a radical stance... God continues to point it back at me.  As i pray for God to break down the chains that bind us... God continues to point it back at me.  It really hurts to take a hard look at myself and see how many times i behave like the Pharisees.  Well that statement was not actually true, it is more accurate if i said most of my days i have acted just like them.  Knowing what is right but spitting it at people more than loving it into them.  I can't do it anymore. 

This journey with the Lord has changed me forever.  I don't want to be the shell of the woman i was a year ago; doing the "God thing" just enough, until it becomes too wierd, too radical, too threatening to others here in the states.  Honestly i'm a little sick of status quo anyway.  And it's tiring to boot!

There is an abundance God offers that i haven't even begun to scratch the surface of and i am eager to get started.  I have put on my "Big Girl, Wierd, Radical panties"  and i am on my way.  Eager to please the Lord and caring little about what others think about it.

See when i read things like:  Jesus said:
*"For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life as a ransom for many."  Mark 10:45
*"I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me."  Matthew 25:40
*"Do to others as you would have them do unto you." Luke 6:31
*"Whoever serves me must follow me; and where i am, my servant also will be.   My Father will honor the one who serves me."  John 12:26

it causes me to review my actions.  I am called to serve, and that includes all people and to treat them as i would want to be treated.  To go outside of my comfort zone and be all things to all people.  That has not been the driving force of my life, it has been much more about "doing just enough", never too much though.

Well that is just not enough anymore.  I really do want to give my life as a ransom, to surrender with no "clauses", to go with God wherever, whenever and however.  Sound radical?  Sounds like freedom to me!

I was watching Lifetoday this morning and my heart was ripped out as they were showing clips of children being trafficked.  God help us as our society is at an all time low.  As tears poured down my face i realized i am called to be part of the solution as long as i still have breath here on earth.  I, as a believer, am called to be a worldchanger.  i can spend my life saying one day... when i have more money... or more time or... fill in the blank... i'll do something and i can waste my whole life away, or i can begin now.  So i choose now. i have been given much therefore i have much to do with it.

Someone said "If you want to change the world, change the life of a child."  As i looked into the sweet face of my baby girl this morning that turned 8 today my prayer for her was "Lord let her get you now as a young child in ways that i am just now discovering.  Grab her heart, give her a desire to be a worldchanger in your name!"  What a birthday gift that would be!

That was alot of words to say... i don't know where we are in the process and i don't know what today holds much less tomorrow... but i do know the One who holds today.  And regardless of what is ahead, He is worth it!  Whatever the picture of our future looks like - Glory to God!  I believe whatever comes it is just taking us one step closer to Knowing Him more!

Thanks for joining arms with us in this journey!  LeAnn

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Nothing new...

I wish i had some news to share, but i don't, we know nothing. But God certainly knows...  He sees all the pieces.  And His timing is perfect, so there must be things behind the scenes still to be worked out.  So we will continue in the "not yet wait".  Hopefully we will let you know something soon!

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Keep on keeping on...

Well we are back into the wait.  i don't know when we will hear something or from someone.  And that is ok, God is behind the scenes working the pieces as He so chooses. Right now we are simply resting in Him.

This morning in Oswald Chambers devotional, My Utmost for His Highest, i read, "We need to learn this secret of the burning heart.  Suddenly, Jesus appears to us, fires are set ablaze, and we are given wonderful visions; but then we must learn to maintain the secret of the burning heart - a heart that can go through anything.  It is the simple, dreary day, with its commonplace duties and people, that smothers the burning heart - unless we have learned the secret of abiding in Jesus". 

Wow, what a word for me personally this morning.  See i was getting sidetracked on things i cannot control.  I am not there nor do i have anything to do with the procedures.  But i do have the vision that the Lord gave me and the burning heart to see it through.  I cannot allow myself to get caught in the distractions of complications or opinions or problems we might endure along the way.  I am to keep the fire burning and see the vision through.  The problems that may arise next week or the week after; we will tackle them as we get to them, but for today i have to see the original plan through whatever the cost. 

Knowing that is all i am responsible for today brings joy.  We will see case one and two all the way through as much as it depends on us and then once we've seen it through we will go where the Lord leads with the others.  That is as far as He has shown me for today.

Loving Him and you!  LeAnn

Monday, March 21, 2011

It is a new day!

I am thankful that the Lord will not give us more than we can handle.  I am thankful that the Lord is faithful and He is always near.  I am thankful that the Lord will give us strength to face whatever comes at us today.  I am thankful that the Lord will absolutly not abandon us in this situation but guide us as we move ahead.    As i sat at His feet this morning "His peace" spread over me like a blanket.  I know that however He works this all out... it is all for His Glory and for the good of all involved. 

I wish i was able to share all the specifics that are going on, but the reality is this blogspot is just not a safe place to share... I wish i could sit across from each of you with our BIG glasses of tea and share all, but i can't...  I wish i could tell you all the beautiful God moments throughout the last 14 months and the way God has grown me in this faith journey, but again i can't... so instead i ask that you would join me in prayer, knowing there are HUGE things going on in and around this adoption.  We are overwhelmed that the Lord is allowing us to sit on the front row while He is doing unbelievable things in the lives of many. 

Today is a brand new day and with a new day i am sure there will be new challenges ushered in.  I do not know what is going on in the other part of the world.  I know this is a really big week and there are meetings and decisions and more meetings.  i don't know who is in them and what is being decided.  But i know the forward progress hinges on this week.  And since there are no accidents with God, it is exactly as it should be.  I can't say i understand it all but i do understand the one who controls it all.  He is Good all the time. 

Someone once said, "God swings big doors on little hinges."  I believe we are in a "big door" moment.  And we will not understand the significance of all that is going on until much later.   So much is hanging in the balance this week... there are tons of people involved.  But as a believer i know who really holds the control strings. 

I am scared, i am excited, i am apprehensive and i am anxious, but more than all these i am trusting.  God will show up in mighty and amazing ways, i just pray we don't miss Him.  As the last 14 months begin to all come together as God intented, i am desperate to follow Him in unwavering obedience whatever His plan may be. 

In Proverbs 3:5-6 we are told, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight."  Today God has brought a new and deeper revelation of the words to my soul.  It is a glorious new day!

I love you dearly and thank you for staying this course with our family!

Saturday, March 19, 2011

What a cool journey...

Now that we've had time to wrap our minds around it all, we are beginning to look at our options.  It is all a little scary, but it is exciting as well.  I spent two hours today on skype talking about what it all might look like. We won't be able to share any of this until the social workers talk with case 2 this week.  Until we know some answers I will sign off.

God has a plan...

when i opened the blog a moment ago and saw over a hundred people had visited today, can i just tell you my heart was overwhelmed.  thank you for your prayers, we feel them.

the blog address i posted earlier was incorrect, it is http://www.kissesfromkatie.blogspot.com/.  So sorry!

today in my time with the Lord i was talking through some pretty tough scenarios.  i was asking Him to reveal Himself to me in light of what was happening;  laying before me was a devotional book and this is what i read for the day: 
"God assures you that for every good work that you attempt, you will never face a shortfall of His grace in order to successfully complete the task God has given you.  What does God want to do in the lives of those around you that waits upon your trust in Him and the removal of your doubts?"

There is no such thing as coincidence, so in light of all that is going on in our small piece of the world i have taken this question to heart. 

As we face the decisions that lay ahead we are praying fervently for God's light.  We began with one, then entered two and now there are four children with broken hearts and beautiful smiles that we are praying for God's direction concerning.  It is easy to say it is not my problem, but isn't it?  God is the decider of our days and what goes on in them.  He has interwoven our lives "for such a time as this".  Now what we do with it all, we don't know.

As a mom my heart is grieving, praying and crying for help.  a young tween should never be faced with these kinds of decisions.  And God has called me to be his mother and i cannot help him. 

Case one is ready for our arrival.  Case two will be handled this week with the social workers continuing to persuade him there is a better life around the corner. 

We know God will not give us more than we can handle. Please pray as we look at all the pieces of the puzzle we would be ready and willing to take the next step as God directs.

i love you all dearly, LeAnn

Well what now?

There is really no change in the situation, but certainly there is in our hearts.  Personally and honestly, my heart was torn out, ran over and laid to the side yesterday.  My hearts desire is truly to walk on the path the Lord has laid out for me. Everything whirling in my head is so contrary to my normal behaviors.  God has me on a journey. 

I pictured my middle daughter being asked the very "grown up" question yesterday: if she would take a better life knowing that her siblings would not be traveling with her.  Whoa, i cannot imagine the feelings that would accompany that decision.  I need the Lord to direct me in this all, i do not want my humanity in the way of His perfect plan. 

We have cried, we have been praying, we are seeking as i type!  We give God all glory that He is even allowing us to be a part of what is happening in these childrens' lives. 

As i sat at the Father's feet yesterday i felt alot like Peter as Jesus asked Him, "do you love me?"  See i made a promise 13 months ago to the Lord that whatever it took i'd see this through.  Sometimes when we get to the actual act we begin to count the cost and embarrasingly that is where i sat yesterday as the possibilities began to lay before me.  Sometimes when the rubber meets the road the cost is more than we anticipated.  Is God worth it, you bet He is. 

So... with that said we are praying over what this week will bring to the table and what exactly that means for the family. 

Before i began to write this morning, i went to http://www.kissesforkatie.blogspot.com/.  This is a blog i have followed for a very long time and i  looked once again at the entry entitled "Full Circle".  I needed a fresh reminder that our yes must stay yes even if at the end of the day His plan and what we thought ours was doesn't quite match. 

God's call on Jesus' life was costly, why would i think mine would be any different!  I am looking forward to seeing what our family looks like when God's plan completely unfolds.  Pray for us as we continue to move forward in it all.  I will keep you posted as soon as i know anything!

Friday, March 18, 2011

Well? God knows...

Today has been an interesting turn of events.  The boys were busy with chores this morning so the meeting did not occur.  Imagine?  For some reason God was not ready for the meeting to transpire.  The social worker would like it better if we could find a place for the siblings.  It is just all so complicated.  But God knows how all the pieces fit together and we are trusting and believing Him.  We still haven't recieved our number in the mail to complete our study here in the states (arriving anytime... something else to add to the prayer list).  So we are still waiting on our side as well.

They gave a weeks time to talk with case 2 about his decision.  And we are praying about what that looks like.  i have to admit God is doing something in my own heart.  When i began to put names and faces on the siblings the whole thing is harder and harder.  I cannot imagine my middle girl being asked to leave her younger and older siblings behind.  Yes, call me sentimental but i am searching the Lord's heart in this so that His desires will be mine.  Please join me in this, i really want to hear Him clear in how we progress forward. 

Tonight i will have an update on how the remainder of the day played out,  I will update you as soon as i know something.  This wait is God intended and I know He never puts us into a wait that we are not to learn something or sometimes even switch directions, so we are listening for His voice!

Thanks so much for praying that all involved hear HIM CLEAR!

I love you all so much, thanks for sticking with us!

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Last for the night

So at 7:30 our time they will be meeting with the oldest at the shelter to hear his heart.  This will be stressful on all involved.  We have no idea which way it will go.  Pray for all involved that we lean into God.  We want our boys to find thier way home quickly, if that is not God's plan then there is a better plan we just haven't seen it yet.  Thanks for joining us in prayer.

God is so faithful!

Well if you have followed this journey any amount of time you know our slogan the entire time has been "Nothing is impossible for God".  And we stand tall on that belief.  From the beginning we were told none of this could happen.  But God had another plan.  We certainly don't claim to know what that final picture looks like but i can tell you our faith has grown by leaps and bounds watching God move one mountain after another.  After we arrive back in the states i will go back and blog the story from the beginning.  But for the safety of the case i will not share any of it nor any information about the boys. 

Our lawyer has approval from judge of case 1 to consolidate his case with the 2nd case.  So now both boys will be under one Judge.  Praise the Lord.  One hill crossed many more to come. 

In the am our lawyer and gov't officials will be on sight speaking with the older of the two (case number two).  This would be the one with special circumstances.

The social worker is not opposed to the adoption so will plan to meet with boy 2 in the am to hear his heart.

We covet your prayers as always!


Where we are today...

Well the lawyer has arrived and the proceedings have begun.  Please be in prayer as God continues to lay out the steps of this journey.  God is in complete control and we are awaiting His vision as He shows us the pieces.  Tonight i should have more info!  Love to you all!  LeAnn