Feelings?!

everyday someone asks about our family... the size, the adaption, the struggles...

so let me go ahead and clear the air...  it is BIG!

 

our house is obnoxiously loud, we are late to everything, because we don't have enough seats...

or too many of their things start at the same time... or we cant find what they need.. the list goes on. 

 

i remember in my smugness when i used to glance at "that mom"

and think wow, she needs to get it together... well let me say it for you... THAT IS ME!

i glance around often and think what happened?

 

i often travel in a baseball cap, because i cannot make it to the shower...

i am constantly the one being reminded about the things i need to make or bring...

because once again i didn't check my email. 

and at almost any given time you can walk in my house and my exquisite dining table is full...

of undergarments, computers or a plethora of other uninteresting things i could list. 

 

we used to spend at least one night a weekend with friends... yeah we don't make the invite anymore...

i used to enjoy lots of  grownup conversation over lunches with the ladies... not so often anymore...

i used to send notes of encouragement to people often... can't even find the note cards now...

why... because life has simply changed!

 

we have been home from our last trip to Brazil for almost 5 months...

 and we are just now beginning to adjust to our once again new normal...

which has truly just been hard!

 

this week was particularly tough .. the last 5 started school... and activies :)

and quite honestly i have to admit i have been feeling pretty overwhelmed and wimpy!

 

so Dad above orchestrated a sit down for he and i this morning... like for hours!

(the boys are at an out of town tournament...

the little girls are at a friends, as is the middle one... and the olders are upstairs with friends).

an i have to admit, i didn't know how bad i needed an attitude adjustment until i got up:)

 

so i was pouring my heart out to Him about "having joy" and He prompted me to look

back at my journal last year from the same day.... and here is what the first lines said,

 

"If you are making excuses for why you are not experiencing an abundant joyful life,

determine today to settle for nothing less than God's best for your life.  Stop

following the world's way of finding satisfaction.  Instead listen to the Saviors voice and you

will find true fulfillment."  Exp God

 

uggggh!  it hit me right in the heart of my feelings! i was whining again!

i literally could hear Him speaking all around me...

which in layman terms would sound something like this...

"LeAnn don't focus on your feelings, they are way overrated...

focus on what i am filling you up with.  Abide in me and i will give you joy.

The world doesn't feed you, i do... lean into me, i will give you rest!"

Just what i needed to hear!! 

 

it never ceases to amaze me that, no matter how whiny or selfish i am being...

 i serve a heavenly daddy that will meet me right where i am and give me an

opportunity to get my heart and obedience back on track! 

 

so with a heart full of gratitude and no longer wimpy feelings...

i can say loudly and proudly life is an incredible adventure right now...

not one day looks the same!!

 

when i can't seem to find my "happy" i will do just as the Lord instructed me this morning...

I WILL REMEMBER...

 

that God has blessed us with the gift of family, friends and laughter!!

 

 

that so many do without daily! Be thankful!!

 

that love is priceless,  so many would give anything to have what we have!!

 



 

We are blessed beyond what we deserve!! (dogs and all!)

 

 

when i'm tempted to whine about being overwhelmed, challenged or exhausted...

 i will choose instead to REMEMBER!

 

God's aware and got this! 

He tolds you and i friend in the palm of His hand.

Maybe today is a great day for you to hit memory lane too!

 

don't let the world tell you that FEELINGS are what we should act out on...

instead trust in the Lords FILLING!

He will provide for you if only you will choose today to

BE STILL AND ABIDE IN HIM!

 

 

great is thy faithfulness

its been weird being off social media for an entire month...

and incredible all at the same time :)

 

 i will give you a give you a quick peek of the month...

 

the kids all went to various camps...

(maddie and gracie at camp maranatha)

 

(chloe and erik at willowbrook live camp)

(scott turned 30... yet again!)



(the pool was always full)

(we made new forever friends...... 





the krells sasha from ukraine)



(gracie braved a dental emergency...)

(dr. sonya's work is unbelievable)

this month has been chalked full of alot of heightened emotions,

as school decisions have had to be made...

so...

this is our first year to deal with college (money... :)...

we will have a senior being homeschooled...

we will have a freshman in private school...

we will have 4 middle schoolers and 1elemenatry schooler in public...

we are all over the place... but we believe this is a good plan!

i can't believe summer is coming to an end!

i always enter into the month of august with mixed emotions...

sadness that summer is over, but gladness to be returning to a routine.

everything i have shared of the last month is dear to my heart



but one thing stands out above them all... God's faithfulness!

 

3 1/2 years ago God called us to an unbelievable journey.

One that would cross our paths with a remarkable young man...

 

 

one i knew was my son from the moment we met!

 

a young man filled to the brim with:

 anger, frustration, confusion, questions and loads of doubts. 

 

our journey has been full of ups and downs, highs and lows

and lots of tears... but God has stuck so close through it all.

He has proven Himself as...

a faithful force in my doubts...

a strong presence in my weakness...

a stern voice in my whining...

a quick hand of discipline in my lack of trust...

and one that never leaves.   

and we've expressed this truth to erik again and again!

 

while our unit of 10 is far from perfect... we remain together!

we absolutely believe in following Jesus at all cost,

and we care nothing about what others say or think about it.

 

this truth used to rub erik a little raw,

but now has become his way of thinking too...

So...

it is with utmost pleasure that i share that

HE TOO has joined the KINGDOM OF ONE...

GOD THE FATHERS!!

 

 

i don't know where the storyline goes from here,

but you could not have made me believe...

way back then, that it would have made its way here...

GOD IS SO FAITHFUL!!

 

can i just encourage you...

DO NOT GIVE UP ON THE ONE... GOD DOESN'T...

HIS FAITHFULNESS WILL SEE YOU THROUGH!