Taking it to the next level...

So we are down to the last few months before we are reunited with two of our four Brazilian family members... It has been a long journey, but a good one...

Since we have been legally matched now, we are beginning the final paperwork... However... As we have evidenced again and again anything can happen, so pls continue to pray.

Yesterday we had the coolest gift, which was absolutely orchestrated by the Lord... Our sweet friends in Brazil (who have been fighting for us on the ground) were granted visitation with one of our boys for the week... And we got to Skype with them... It was SO... I can't even put my thoughts into words...

Let me try to explain... It was wierd and right all at the same time... It was awkward and perfect... It was different and wonderful... It was exciting and serile... It was scary and exhilirating... all at the SAME time... I don't know if that makes any sense, but it's absolutely true! This short moment in time took my emotions to a whole new level!!

As I sat with the Lord this morning trying to understand what all I was feeling, I realized that we've been fighting for this reality SO LONG that I have yet to allow myself to think about what happens from here... And what a perfect time to allow my heart to go there! As the New year is about to find its way... It brings with it a title wave of "new beginnings"... And... a time to make choices about the direction we are headed...

The New Year is a time to reflect on the past, a time to look forward to the future, a time to Praise God in the present and a time to take our commitment to the Lord to the next level...

What a reality today has held?... For us... Our immediate future will incl. adding a 13 yr old boy and a 10 yr old boy... from a different culture, that speak a different language... And that live an ocean away... Only a PERFECT GOD could do something so amazing!!!

I am overwhelmed at the blessing of telling the boys all about you who have been fighting from your knees on their behalf... and about the Father up above who gave them to us... The One who knit them together and sent His Son to save them... What a glorious day that will be!

As you and yours ponder all the new beginnings around the corner... I pray that your walk with the Lord is first on the list... What a perfect time to reflect on your Creator and consider what going to the next level with Him means!

Know that I appreciate you and love you from the depths of my heart, LeAnn

'happily ever after'

the other night Jordan came in from work looking quite pretty...

she had played Cinderella at a school earlier in the day...

long after i had snapped the photo and she had gone up to spend hours trying to get all the makeup off her face and the "stuff" out of her hair... i begin to think about life... and the fairytale stories we read so often...

i began to think about all the days i wished for a "glass slipper" ending to the day... but instead i got a "scrubbing floors and holding a mop bucket" kinda ending to the day...  i wonder how many of you know just what i mean...  i have certainly had more than a few of those lately!  but you know what i have begun to find... though i don't feel all pretty and perfect at the end of the day... i feel accomplished and joyful and good... we were created to make a difference...

i have decided "glass slipper" days are overrated... they are perfect for fairytales that we read about but for everyday life i got other things to do than put on alot of makeup, prance around and try to be perfect... that is for my precious dauthters to enjoy...  i got work to do... my Cinderella days will come when i get TO THE OTHER SIDE... my happily ever after is when i am at the foot of the throne WORSHIPING MY KING... so until then there are MANY others i am called to help find thier way to a FOREVER happily ever after... beginning with my four babies over in South America!!

so thank you for your continued prayers... movement is happening as we speak... paperwork is being sent... and mountains are FALLING into the sea... our GOD IS MIGHTY!!

the approval papers HAVE MADE IT TO OUR AGENT... so we are on the home stretch...  it won't be long until we are sitting across from our 2 boys sharing with them about the only TRUE HAPPILY EVER AFTER!!  What a day that will be :)

oh how He loves them so...

i am so sorry i haven't updated you... i have been busy with the Lord handling some things that needed to be handled...

 i needed to spend some good 'ol girl time with my daughters ~and their friends :)

i needed to spend some time putting some closure to my current work situation so the Lord could have my full attention, as well as celebrating His birthday in style with the elves :)

and i needed to get away for some good 'ol girlfriend time :)

each of these are exactly what the Lord ordered for my encouragement to handle the next battle... lest we be deceived the enemy is on the field :(

i am a glass half full kind of girl... i absolutely believe in people... sometimes to my ruin...  and this process has certainly been a test of my belief...

SO WE HAVE BEEN APPROVED!!  PRAISE THE LORD!!  however, the enemy is using people, as he most commonly does, to continue to confuse the process... this whole week has been one big battle... please continue to pray for the boys...

our Lord, however, in His infinite wisdom and sovereignty has His people in place to continue to fight all the enemies advances... but it does and continues to prolong the process...

here is what i love though... THE ENEMY DOES NOT WIN, GOD DOES... GOD IS ALWAYS IN CONTROL AND IS WORKING FOR THE GOOD OF THE KINGDOM!!  He will not leave my boys high and dry... you know how i know? because the Bible tells me so :)  He loves them more than i do!!

i will know so much more tomorrow, i will keep you posted!!  

so thankful for the gift of laughter...

i believe that a good bout of laughter always helps the aching heart!!

so i was sitting down to let you in on the latest with a heavy heart and i looked down and read on a piece of paper sitting on my desk this...

 What do call cheese that isn't yours?  Nacho Cheese

 What do you call four bullfighters in quicksand? Quatro sinko

i belly laughed.  i am so thankful that God knew what today held and that He knew that i would need silly humor to lighten my mood :)  what a gift laughter is!

so the meeting NEVER happened yesterday.... and today is a holiday... hmmmmm?!!?!  so my guess is tomorrow they will be closed as well... God is definitely teaching me about His timing :)

so it could be tomorrow, or it could be monday or it could be... your guess is as good as mine!  i'll let you know when i know something!

in the meantime God is doing a work in my heart... as i've continued to cling tightly to Him and surrender deeper daily...  it's interesting how He changes my perspective as i've entered deeper than ever before into another's pain... 

i'm still here in my comfy home with my wonderful family in the middle of an amazing holiday season...  while my boys are in an orphanage that is none to comfy... with no family... and limited understanding of the GREATNESS of this season...

oh how i pray you hug your family tight today... that you laugh deeply with them... that you count your blessings... that you point all around you to Him... and that you quit sweating over the small stuff... those gifts you haven't bought or wrapped is not what brings the joy of the season... nor is how many parties we can go to... IT IS JESUS... please don't let that point be missed!

Praying for you and yours!  LeAnn

  

yep, i don't know, but He has a plan!

that really sounds so cliche` but it is the truth.  i don't have another answer... in His perfect timing we will be on our way!

whether the judge signs our papers on the morning of dec 7th or not is the million dollar question?!  however, as much as my flesh would like to walk around sometimes with my lip stuck out like my kids above... sitting around just waiting on a call... it would bring NO GLORY TO MY GOD, so i make a decision of the will to not!

i choose to continue to worship Him and serve Him in the wait, shining His light for all to see...to lift His name high (what better time than this season that is all about Him, "CHRIST"mas). 

so we will LOVE HIM and THEM FROM AFAR until our time has come to be all together :)

if we wait til we can handle something... we'll do nothing...

i caught myself singing the lyrics to jingle bells a little while ago and i got so tickled... i love life... as stinky and as hard as sometimes it can be... i love life...  it doesn't negate my desire for life in heaven... it just makes it stronger... because there will be none of the stinky parts and the good parts will be better...  so... while i long for my new home i am going to enjoy every second of my time here until i leave for it... so as the lyrics of the song go... i will be laughing all the way...

the kids are all away this afternoon and i've been preparing for a Bible study for January...  when i looked around a minute ago i began to belly laugh yet AGAIN!  if the social worker came today that would be it... i would be deemed unsuitable...  besides the fact i've been at the computer all day and i am unshowered... here is what i see when i look around...

yes, thats my desk under all those books and papers :)

and yeah that is a tall ladder in the middle of our foyer (that has been there since saturday when we began the decorations)  and behind it... that is our table covered in decorations, also there since sat :)

so i laughed outloud at the thought of adding more to our household (as many others have)... more to the chaos we call home... more to the craziness of the Newsom clan...  is this really the time Lord??

however something i've found to be true with me and lots of others is this... if we wait until we think we can handle something or when we can afford it, we most often end up doing nothing...  so why not now? 

interesting thing i have found about God's timing and His will verses mine is that He doesn't ask me if i think i can handle something, nor does He request a time frame that i am willing to do His will in, nor does He even ask if it is a good time for me and my family, HE SIMPLY ASKS IF I AM AVAILABLE AND WILLING TO OBEY!   

and the resounding answer is YES LORD SEND ME!!  wherever, whenever, however, to do whatever...  that includes opening my home for MORE TO LOVE...  for MORE TO SHARE THE LOVE OF THE FATHER WITH... yes and for more to join in the chaos we call home...

how grateful i am JESUS was WILLING to be available and obedient so that I would know the Fathers love...

as i was closing this tree caught my eye... so i had to snap a shot and include it... it is the tree i cherish most... it is in my office (so the kids won't throw away the ornaments)... it is full of amazing memories... it has ornaments all over it that the kids have made and given me over the years... although they complain about them... they come in and reminence over all the fond memories that we have had over the years... they have NEVER complained once about the chaos that surrounded the time frame of each of the ornaments but instead they smile and laugh about the family that was there walking with them through each step of thier life that the ornaments represent...  why wouldn't i want to share that :)

Can i handle it... IF GOD SAYS SO!!

 

got lemons... make lemonade!

what an awesome time of year... i love thanksgiving!  we had an incredible time with family and friends... we ate too much, talked continually and laughed often...  i had even gotten wind of a program the boys had at school where one said he was thankful for "his new mom" and the other said he was thankful for "his new home"... i mean really?  i am so blessed... how much better does it get...

yet yesterday after all the guests were long gone and the girls and i were setting up our new homeschool room... yes you heard me right (i can hear you laughing out loud :)... we've all decided we really do love our new lifestyle so we are sticking with it...

i got the news... the hearing wasn't what we thought it would be (imagine that, hehe)...  a new date has been set, December 7th.  i found myself moments later sitting in the boys room embarrassingly being not so thankful!  BUT God in His infinite grace wasn't going to allow me to stay in my self absorbed, ungrateful mode very long... He had a life lesson too teach me, YET AGAIN :) 

as i was sitting there (must have been there a while) staring at their pictures (from our meeting almost two years ago) stating in my mind how "stinky" this news was (with a face twisted up probably much like someone sucking on a lemon)... i heard a beating sound coming from down the hall... so i stood and walked across the hall and opened the door and this is what i found...

i love how God meets me where i am, never tiring of my childishness... and i love how He uses my little ones to remind me of the opportunities before me... :)

see Gracie wants drums and has for a LONG time... however, we won't buy her drums... we have had the conversation many times about the fact that when we feel she is ready for them THEN we will give them to her... sometimes the answer sits well and sometimes not...

BUT this time i love what she did about it... instead of fussing she made the most out of the moment...  this time when she didn't get what she wanted (and got lemons instead)... she chose to make lemonade out of them instead of whine or fuss... she found some toy buckets, made her a drum set and was playing some sweet, LOUD music :)  i giggled as i walked away (of course after videoing her in concert)... with a completely different mind set!

God knows when we are ready for them... He knows when they are ready to be here... He knows when His kingdom will be best served... He knows when our families reunion will bring Him the most Glory... He knows the exact time and date it will all happen... and His plan is perfect :)

so the next time i think i am getting served lemons in this adoption process... i think i will follow Gracie's example and see if i can't make some good 'ol lemonade out of the circumstance :)

really... wait some more?!?

sat was my niece's b'day party... and it was at CHUCKEE CHEESE...  (i will not share my opinion about this particular location... you can guess... :)

aren't they cute... so anyway... we had been there a while when the infamous chuckee cheese made his way out... it was only minutes before Gracie was tugging at my sleeve... as you can imagine the scene went something like this...

   "mom, come... hurry Chuckee is over there." 

   "yeah, sweetie be there in a minute."

   "no really hurry... he is going to be gone."

   "no baby... trust me... he is here ALL DAY!"

   "i want a picture with him, pleeeeeeeeeease!"

   "wait just a sec, i'll be there!"

   "no, no, no, you see he's gonna leave."

   "honey, really if we go over now, we have to stand in that LONG line."

   "mom, come on, do you know where we are?"

   "just wait a few more minutes and we'll go..."

   "i've been waiting... pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeese!" 

so we went and stood in line and waited :)  some of you laughed all the way through that conversation because you've had it!

anyway i have a point for sharing the story... as i sat back and thought over the whole scene i got tickled... and the more i thought about it the harder i laughed... because i am Gracie (just in grown up body)...

every day since last December i have woken up and literally said "ok Lord is this the day we get the news?"  last year i even said out loud "i am boarding a plane on dec 16th (2010) to go get them"... ha...

i have read into things and created my own story line... and you can guess how that worked out... i've cried and kicked my feet... you can figure that one out too i'm sure... i've told our story again and again... to some with glazed eyes... i have handled each day different... however at the end of the day each and every one of them for 11 months now has been the same gentle reminder... just wait...

so how have i responded? well to my embarrassment... and totally being transparent... my dialogue has sounded just like Gracie... except it just wasn't said out loud! 

it went something like...  "God hurry!"  "we need to get there."  "they need us."  "really Lord do you know where they are?"  "they'd be so much better if we'd get there!"

i could keep going but honestly i don't want to... i'm sure you get the picture...

as i have been so incredibly impatient over the years... i have to exclaim... it is all worth it... the wait has TAUGHT US SO MUCH!  God is so patient, kind and good!  He never tires of my 8 year old behaviors... He doesn't leave me hanging nor does He applaud my inappropriate behavior when i don't get my way... He meets me where i am and gives me the opportunity to learn from Him how to be more like Jesus in the circumstance...

His faithfulness blows my mind... He is always beside me as i wait for the next step of our journey... and He has never wasted a moment of the wait... this journey has brought me face to face with my selfishness and my ridiculous need to know the next step... it has been humbling to say the least...

so what about the boys... they are being SO BLESSED by God during this wait... when it's all done and said and i can share the whole story with you i will... God's hand prints are all over them and us as our roads continue to weave together... a beautiful picture of God's glory is being painted through HIS STORY in all of our lives... so yes we will be waiting some more... but i can say with complete confidence... it is worth it!

We have no confirm yet on the supposed meeting this Friday, but will let you know when we know.  Regardless of this weeks outcome... we know God's got this :)

  

just relax...

i don't know about you but when someone tells me to "just relax" it is not usually because they are trying to be thoughtful :)  I'm not very good at it, yet often it is exactly what i need to do.  this morning i had just gotten all three girls stationed in their school space with their assignments for the hour in front of them when i decided I'd JUST RELAX.   well that lasted about 10 minutes before my eyes rested on a photo of one of our boys and my mind went crazy with thoughts like:  will the judge look at our paperwork today?  will the boys hear that we've been pronounced their parents?  will we be traveling in January?  who should i email or call to find out?  and i could list 20 more questions that sound something of the same...  i began struggling to "take every thought captive and obedient to Christ"...  and as i began to seek Him for help... my eyes fell on two of the sweetest pics...

of our four shih-tzu's, these two: daisy and cookie, were in immediate eye shot... now they are relaxed!

it didn't take but a minute as i stared at them before i felt God move within my Spirit as He spoke over me...  and this is what i heard:  "what makes them just relax LeAnn?  is it that they trust you!  they trust you to feed them, to comfort them, to protect them and to care for them...  they have experience with you and know you are their care giver... so when you are near... they can relax!  I AM WITH YOU ALL THE TIME!  you can trust me... i will feed you, comfort you, protect you and care for you... you have experience with me as your caregiver... i will never leave your side so just relax!!  I'm over the situation and in control, so just relax!"

i began to feel my shoulders ease and my bite loosen... being anxious today will do nothing for the situation... emailing and calling around will do nothing but frustrate all the officials... BUT trusting in the Lord... crying out TO HIM on their behalf... and then relaxing and letting Him handle all the details... now that is my best course of defense for all involved...so I'm going to take my cue from the pups!

if the courts met today i will let you know, otherwise next Friday would be the next possible date :)

slowing down...

i have had the indescribable joy of discussing being the hands and feet of Jesus with a group of youth the last couple of months.  however, as exciting as the discussion has been, i have found it to be even more enjoyable to work alongside of them practicing what we've discussed.  two of those youth happen to be my daughters...  i caught one on camera the other day as she was working alongside Mr Randy...

what i love about this photo is that the smile on Jordan's face is not posed...  but it's not just her... all the students have that same smile every week as we work... what a blessing!  they are ready and available every week to go and work... wherever needed... doing whatever asked...  that is quite a task for the busy teens we have these days.  for each student, working at this food distribution center each week is their choice... they had to choose it above other things crying out for their time. 

each week as we enter we are greeted by Mr Randy and Mrs Kimberly, who are NEVER in a hurry!  we pray over our work and then we eagerly get started... but NEVER are we in a hurry!  we talk about their lives and ours, we laugh together, we work together, we accomplish together... but NEVER in a hurry!  they have both become precious to each of us as we have slowed down and taken the time to know them and serve others alongside of them... wow, the lessons we would have missed if we had not chosen to spend time with them... lives we would have missed the opportunity to bless in the name of Jesus if we had not slowed down to participate. 

as i continue to sit in the "wait" over our adoption (oh how i so wish i could sit across from you with a glass of tea and a BIG piece of chocolate cake) i have failed to spend ample time gushing about GOD'S FAITHFULNESS!!!!  as much as i would love to have my boys... i wouldn't trade God's timing for mine (i've seen my results too many times).  God has used this adoption process and our two years of "wait" to reveal to us so many areas of our lives that we are missing the good God stuff because of our level of hurry!  and not only are we missing it, but worse is that we are training our children to do the same.  checking scripture and looking at our level of busyness from a Biblical perspective has been humbling :(

we are here TO KNOW GOD and MAKE HIM KNOWN in all situations and circumstances!  the particular circumstance or situation that our family finds itself in that speaks the loudest right now is our adoption...  so... i pray that we slow down and enjoy God's ride through it... basking in who He is, knowing Him more and making the most of exclaiming His Glory through it all!

i can't wait to share God's story with you through the lives of our newest family members... it will be glorious whenever and however it takes place... the reunion is around the corner :)   

    

He is in the details...

the papers were hand delivered yesterday to the "peeps" and the next hearing is either fri the 18th or the 25th... at that point the match between our family and the boys should be made... we'll wait and see what the Lord has in store... 

the whole thing this week has left my shoulders sore and my head hurting...  i was exhausted and tired from the week... and God showed up right where i needed Him!!!  i was blessed by the Shellums this am with an unexpected massage... can i say my shoulders feel great!!

and months ago my friend Kasi and i had decided to take our girls to see Casting Crowns in concert tonight... can you say A NIGHT OF INCREDIBLE WORSHIP... i believe it is just what the doctor ordered... He is always in the details...

will let you know what i hear next!

Smiling at the simple :)

i love it when God gives us a kiss on the head, just in the ordinary and simple of our day.  i just got word that our package has arrived in Brazil and is set to be delivered to whomever the "peeps in charge" are :)  however, we know that GOD IS IN CONTROL! we'll see what happens next!

God's plan is best!

so much for our Christmas in Brazil... truth is, it is probably not on the horizon since our original documents haven't made it to Brazil yet :)  although this is not the plan i wanted or prayed for... i know God's plan is better and that all things are working for the BEST for all involved!

in my time with the Lord early this morning, before those in the house began to stir, i read out of a devotional by Oswald these words:

"All your circumstances are in the hand of God, and therefore you don't ever have to think they are unnatural or unique.  God, by His providence, brings you into circumstances that you can't understand at all but the Spirit of God understands." 

i had been pondering this all day when all of a sudden i had an aha moment and the truth of this statement really sunk in... all my girls, the ones God has uniquely placed into my life today, were gathered around the table studying Porteguese (the language that my other children speak)... and my eyes filled with tears... what a gift...

see i was NEVER having kids.  my mom teases me constantly about my stance all through my younger years; i was rebellious and terrible, mean and unkind and totally self absorbed.  i was filled with the ridiculous idea that i didn't want the headache... how it breaks my heart today to think about it!  i am so grateful that even through my stubborness, God did not give up on me!

He had a plan, He was always working behind the scenes.  as much as i wish i could wash some years of rebellion away... that i could rinse some memories down the drain forever... those years of heartache and brokenness are what brought me to my knees as a beggar before the Lord.  

as He began to break me... the dam of self absorption began to dissolve some (i wish all, but that's far from the truth)!  and i began to love from a depth i had not known before...  my desires changed and my attitudes softened. 

as i look into the faces of those gathered around the table, i am so grateful that i am not in control and never have been!  i am so thankful for a better plan... HIS PLAN!

God absolutly loves my Brazilian babies WAY MORE than i do.  and He is working out thier future for an eternal purpose, one that is WAY BETTER then i can dream up or imagine.  so although i don't know the plan today, tomorrow, this month or the remainder of this year, HE DOES... and it is the BEST!

I am so grateful for an all knowing God!!  LeAnn 

 

Not what i want... but is as He says...

i cannot thank you enough for all your prayers thru this journey and your continued prayers that will see us through.  i am not sure what all is going on behind the scenes but i know with UNMOVED CONFIDENCE that God is in control.  i know He answered our prayers in a better way than we can imagine yesterday, but it was NOT the way i had wanted. 

i was on a field trip yesterday at the space and rocket center when the call came...

after hearing the verdict, i would have to say my heart grieved greatly, and the pent up tears almost began to flow. (see... truth is: even though i had prayed intently for GOD'S WILL TO BE DONE, at the end of the day i wanted my way).  but... all said and done the copied papers were NOT enough, no match was made. 

God had planned ahead for this moment though... as i was literally trying to draw a breath, trying to hold it together yet again... amazing friends stepped in immediately...  they surrounded me, joined hands and did all we had available to us to do... Anissa prayed God's strength and covering through it all.  then my girlfriends took my kids and urged me onward in the battle...  and so i found myself, yet again off to find papers and get them scanned and this time fed exed to South America in hopes the judge would change his ruling soon. 

as i crawled in my car in the parking lot i almost lost my resolve... but i stated outloud in a broken voice... THE ENEMY HAS NO PLACE HERE, I WILL PRAISE HIM!  So i turned up the worship music and sang outloud as tears of pain stayed tucked in their ducts and words of truth ministered to my aching heart.  GOD IS GOOD ALL THE TIME!  after alot of stops i finally made it to the fed ex office in time to get them sent out.  EVERYTHING in my flesh said go home, whine, complain, stomp your feet and lick your wounds, BUT not in my spirit... the words i heard speaking over my aching heart were... DO NOT GROW FAINT...  DO NOT GROW WEARY OF DOING GOOD...  DO NOT GIVE UP NOR GIVE IN... SPEAK LOUD MY TRUTH!!

so i headed on to target to get the fixings for a game night at friends, came home prepared the food and went with a smile on my face...

i told the story countless times, (the exact reason i didn't want to go) yet... what i found was that with each new person i shared with... the resolve grew stronger.  see everytime i shared through the night it reminded me of how blessed i am... it reminded me of the truth: that God NEVER gave up on me... HE never grew tired of pursuing and fighting for me... He never grew tired of the heartaches or the pains that were part of the process... as He was seeking to ADOPT ME INTO HIS FOREVER FAMILY, He NEVER QUIT on me!!  (and I am SO GRATEFUL!)

this new mountain i found myself standing at the base of yesterday has presented our family with yet another opportunity of choice... will we fight or complain, get better because of the hurdles or get bitter??  it is our choice...

so after many hours this morning in quiet time on bended knee... with the ONLY ONE that can give me the strength and resolve to move onward... (and check out my friends surrounding me, how good is our God :)

the choice has been made... with new resolve...  i choose to not GIVE UP... and not only do i choose, but i will fight with a spring in my step and a smile on my face because it is today as God says it is...  can i just say with new meaning... watch out enemy I AM READY!  He is worthy!!  LeAnn

Prayer Warriors Needed!!!!

i know you all have been praying for us diligently and i have no right to make a bigger request, but... prayer is my one and only weapon of defense. so... i'm asking you my friends to join my family in yet another pursuit of the Lord's mighty hand in the matter :)  because i know that NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE WITH GOD, i am choosing to believe that tomorrow will go off with out a hitch.

in the morning (approx 11 a.m our time) there will be a special called meeting (it has been agreed upon by all the officials involved).  in that meeting we are praying that the judge will rule that scanned documents are sufficient for us to move forward.  there are two documents that he still does not have the originals, which he needs.  However, IF GOD SAYS SO, the call will be made on our behalf that we can move forward inspite of this complication. 

if this happens our paperwork can be finalized as early as next week and our prayer will have been answered!!  we are praying that we spend Thanksgiving with the boys, lifting high the name of Jesus in thier country and then Christmas here with the boys, lifting high the name of Jesus in our country ALL AS ONE FAMILY!

we know God is the final decider, so we are asking, if it is HIS WILL, that tomorrows decision slides our way :)  thanks for sticking beside us, we couldn't make it without you!  LeAnn

be still... and wait patiently...

well this past week was somewhat of a blur, but chalked full of fun memories :)  i cannot believe it has been over a week since i updated you... i am so sorry!  i am not making anymore promises about more frequent updates because each time i only get worse, lol!!

i know many of you have already walked the road i walked this week and am fixing to share, however, this was my first.  our oldest girl attended her first homecoming this week (which she has talked about everyday of october).  the week itself was a whirlwind, but nothing like the day of :)  it was a day full to the brim with... hurry up... be still... be patient...  just wait...  hurry up... be still... be patient... just wait...  i am not complaining (i wouldn't have missed it), just sharing the facts.  it was fun, exciting, challenging, hard work and lots of waiting!

we began early (9:30 a.m.) sat morning with our first stop at being at lil' rosies for a good 'ol mexican bfast quesidilla, then we moved swiftly to the mall for our second stop....  i just watched and smiled :)

then it was off to our third stop which was shoe shopping... (no she didn't wear the boots to homecoming but she did buy them)... of course i had to look around too :)

and of course all good homecoming shopping days include starbucks coffee and cake balls... our fourth stop... take note of the very pink nails :)  we enjoyed some sweet conversation...

so our day would be almost over... no just beginning... our fifth stop would be to our 2nd hair salon (Julie saved us, what a God kiss, she did amazing! ) i caught up on email as i waited...

so our 6th stop was home to get the good looks on and then our 7th was to the falls for Lori to take pics:)  beautiful day!

Next, our 8th and final stop (for me) was home to serve up a restaurant style candlelight dinner of steak and chix... our wait staff of 3 (me, Kellie and Skyler) were decked out in black and white... our cook hid out and helped eat (hehe)... it is 8:30 p.m. now and time to send them off...

Saturday there were alot of "be still", "be patient" and "wait" moments throughout the day... although at times tiring or even sometimes frustrating they led to an incredible ending.  each of them brought deeper meaning to the ending... i wouldn't have wanted to miss any of them!

as i was pondering the evening it brought to mind the words the psalmist penned in Psalms 37:7, he writes, "Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him..."  none of those are easy commands... be still, wait or be patient, yet we are told these words again and again in scripture.

i guess saturday i needed to be reminded to enjoy the journey because it leads to a beautiful ending... although not perfect still beautiful.  i think once again i had lost sight of that truth in our adoption process.  the paperwork still has yet to be signed and we are not sure why, the boys are tired and discouraged with the wait (do you blame them), we have changed our calendar so many times now it is just a chuckle as we scratch the next thing out, the album we prepared for thier homecoming this summer is somewhere in so america, and we are reminded hour by hour how little control we really have :)  HOWEVER the journey is still worth it!

God's timing is not mine, but it is PERFECT.  God's calendar doesn't roll like mine, but it is PERFECT.  God's watch doesn't tick like mine, but it is PERFECT.  God's mind doesn't think like mine (stop and thank Him NOW), HIS PLAN IS PERFECT!  i don't understand what is going on behind the scenes but He does.  so i will just BE STILL before Him and SIT PATIENTLY and WAIT for Him...  because the ending is going to be BEAUTIFUL and have such a DEEPER meaning than i even thought possible!  LeAnn

running my race with perseverance...

You know the funny thing about this thing called life is how random things appear, yet I KNOW from God's word there is no such thing as coincidence... God is ALWAYS working... and He ALWAYS has the good of His kingdom in mind.  Within seconds, if i am not careful, i can get sucked into a vacum of comparison; if i am not guarded i will begin to look at others life as compared to mine.  I've seen this truth again and again through our journey called adoption... (saying things like... well there process was easier, shorter, harder, longer, different... fill in the blank, i've thought them all). 

As i was sitting and pondering the most recent setback in our adoption process, God's words from Hebrews 12 began to course through my mind.  The race that i have been predestined to run during my small amount of time on this earth doesn't look like anyone elses, it is specifically for me.  It's hills and valleys, streams and waterfalls will be different.  However, regardless of the view ahead... i am to run it with perseverance, with my eyes focused on the One that matters, Jesus.  I am encouraged in scripture to not lose heart, to not grow weary and to strengthen my feeble arms and weak knees. 

Why were these words of encouragement given?  Because He knew the race would be HARD and we would be tempted to quit or better yet GO WATCH from the sidelines;  He knew it would take us some real RESOLVE IN HIM to run our races with perseverance, to not give up and take the easy road, to bring HIM GLORY IN ALL THINGS.

I would be lying if i said there weren't days that i glanced around at other peoples tracks and wished for a different race... BUT then i quickly remember... NOBODYS race is easy... they are just different.  And GOD chose before the foundations of the earth were laid what our race would look like... so i better just tie my shoes and get busy moving on down the road of my lane... because there is still tons of track to be covered.   

Today Gracie fought with such resolve to win a sackrace for the voices of those around her to say "well done" (she is in the middle and you can tell she is fighting with all she has to win...she is working hard... and she dressed up for it; so she looks good too :)

... my thoughts went to how effective i could be for God's kingdom IF i fought with that same resolve to finish well in my race in order to hear the sound of my Fathers voice speak over me "well done thy good and faithful servant."  

Although nothing about the bend in the road of our journey makes sense today...i will persevere, i will run forward with great resolve!  There are little people on the course of my track that need me to stay focused, a generation behind me that wants me to act on what i believe and a God in heaven that prepared me in advance for the bumps and bruises i'd sustain along the way! 

Jesus NEVER quit persevering for you and i... and i am so grateful!  Do we have the same resolve for Him? 

Wherever my race leads today...i will stay the course because He is absolutly worth it!  LeAnn 

my heart yearns...

Today i had the joy and blessing of going on a walk all by myself in the middle of the day, it was glorious!  As i was walking i was praising Him for all His amazing creations and my enjoyment of them.  I was having quite a time of worship.  I was intercessing on the behalf of so many friends and family.  I was singing worship songs outloud and allowing the words to minister to my soul.  However, somewhere along the journey i went from a place of worship to a place of crying out to the Lord about how my heart yearns for the day i get to hug my babies, kiss them on the forehead and tell them we will be thier forever mommy, daddy and family; always loving them.  What a beautiful picture that played out in my head. 

I went on to explain to the Lord how frustrated i was with the whole process;  you know... the decisions of men hosing up the whole thing.  Even though I KNOW that He knows the ending AND He is allowing the shots to play out the way they are AND He will use everything for a positive ending for HIS GLORY, i was still telling Him my thoughts and wondering if He understood. 

Funny thing is, (as He ALWAYS does), He had some thoughts to share of His own.  (Can you say a big bite of humble pie :) )  It didn't take me long to see a whole other picture play out in my minds eye!

Within seconds i had a picture of how God the Father yearns, aches and hurts to be a forever daddy to the many lost souls here on earth.  And how our "free will decisions" just hose up the whole thing.  He has made a way, yet pride, ego, self-sufficiency and many others decisions keep many from falling into His arms to feel His hugs, His kisses and His loving affection.  He ABSOLUTELY understands the pain... even better than i do. 

Yes my heart yearns...  but so does His!!  He will see me through this journey; giving me every bit of strength, power and might that i need to bring Glory to His Name through it all!

I needed a swift kick in the bum... a reminder... to rejoice in the Lord always... to not be anxious... to present my requests before Him with a heart of thanksgiving... because He WILL BE WITH ME... every trial i face, every circumstance that goes awry, every time i think i can't do another day of it... every time my heart yearns!!!

I love Him more every second of every day!  LeAnn

thankful in all things...

for homecoming shopping:

for cute hats:

for camp fires:

for daughters who want to bring awareness to breast cancer and a co-op that embraces it:

for family:

and for friends who believe in what Katie Davis is doing (check out her blog... www.kissesfromkatie.blogspot.com)...

God is good all the time and we are so blessed! I say it a thousand times a day!  Regardless of my frustration over some things i can never forget how incredible God is and i am so thankful for it.  

All i have been told today about the boys and where we are is:  (drum roll please...) to have more patience... :) 

So i'll repeat it again... God is good all the time!  LeAnn

Walking by faith and not by sight...

So our house has been somewhat chaotic these past few weeks.  As a matter of fact if i told the truth i'd have to say i feel a tad bit like a circus elephant; it's as if i'm turning circle after circle in the middle of the arena while hundreds of people are observing :)  It's a little unnerving as i see God unravel my life one strand at a time, yet exhilarating all at the same time.   

The last mtn we came up against was big and ferocious... however, God was able and willing to scale it.  i have to say i had to cling tightly to Him to not lose my vision.  The waves have been coming for 20 months now and the fight just keeps getting harder.  But they are worth it!!

Over the past few weeks i have spent the majority of the time down low.  I am broken and it is beautiful.  I didn't realize how good i had gotten at keeping all my balls in the air, finding success in the endeavors i found myself in, but not anymore.  i want to simply love Jesus and others more!!  i've had to begin dropping balls to love my best, to be available when He places a need before me!  it really is freeing, yet painful at times.

I can't see anything in the space before me but HIM, and that is ok.  The boys are in private school, immersed in English and HE LOVES THEM, that has to be enough.  I am trying to keep my eyes up and not on the horizon before me so that i do not lose heart.  What i see with my eyes is NEVER as it seems...  The truth of it all is it is only as HE WILLS!

I would like to say we are in the clear now but i do not know.  We were supposed to already have some paperwork that we do not have so... we are again in the wait... We SHOULD (i laughed out loud when i typed that) know something soon.  I will try to update daily from here on out even if it is a simple line. 

Adoring the ONE with the plan!!  LeAnn

When the going gets tough... stay on your knees!

Staying on my knees is the only thing that truly keeps me sane.  I need God in such a HUGE way!  I've always known it but as i i've aged i've gotten better at expressing it :)

We are under some major spiritual warfare right now.  We are in the biggest battle we've found ourselves in since the onset of the adoption.  I cannot share because i do not have that freedom for now. 

I can say that i am once again finding myself in a position of simply trusting when all looks black.  All the lights have gone out and i can no longer see a foot in front of me.  i don't know why God is allowing a new mountain to scale but He is and i know He has equipped us to scale it. 

Someone asked me the other day if the journey was tiring and what kept me from giving up.  Well my first response would be "Really? Of course it is tiring but so is everybody elses journeys."  And secondly "What would possess me to give up?  These are lives we are talking about, flesh and blood!  Lives that deserve the saving grace knowledge of Jesus Christ.  Isn't a life of freedom worth fighting for?"

Helen Keller said, "I am only one, but still i am one.  I cannot do everthing, but still i can do something; and because i cannot do everything, i will not refuse to do something that i can do." 

I will pray and pray and pray again.  Not just for my kiddos that need a parent, but for the millions more out there just like them. 

Thank you friends for praying us through this journey, we can feel your prayers!  LeAnn

God's plan is perfect!

You know it was no accident that in February 2010 i found myself a plane ride and ocean away from the family that i knew.  And in an instant in time, a breathe of air, as quick as it took me to sing the words "Happy Birthday" i found myself face to face with family i'd yet to meet.  How cool is our God!! 

I can't make up stuff such as this if i tried.  God's plan for my existence and journey began before i found my way out of my mom's birthing canal.  ...if i had known all the mystery and heartache life held would i have wanted to come out?  i can answer with honesty and certainty... absolutely!  To love "wholeheartedly" "without reserve" and "sacrificially"  is worth it!

When Jesus talks about the fact that to be His disciple means that we must deny self, pick up our cross and follow Him... that immediately speaks to heartache.  God's plan from the beginning was that i'd walk in complete surrender, yeilding to His plan.  I wish i'd done a better job over the years, but i can't change that now, however, i can live different going forward! 

The embassy's involved are continuing to discuss our case... God knows!  They are still pushing paperwork... God knows!  We are still waiting... God knows!   The boys are still without an earthly mother or daddy tonight... God knows!  There is nothing He isn't aware of or allowing!   So i believe  part of my surrender today  to be: letting go of my selfish wants, trust in His perfect timing and plan and continue to love without reserve!  He has a plan and it is perfect!

He Alone Is Worthy!!  LeAnn

Really??

So this morning we had a change of plans.  I was supposed to be taping a Bible study and due to some malfunctioning equipment we had to postpone til next week.  I had already cancelled (due to the taping) our normal Thursday Mission day with an incredible group of students.  Our family guests had gone to the doctor, so... the girls and i found ourselves here with some time on our hands.  I was so excited to have extra time to spend with my daddy.  I got the girls all set up with their school work and i curled up in a chair with Bible in hand.  I had a sweet time of refreshment, however it hit me some hours later that i had spent more time than i realized and i needed to shower quick so we could make it to a preplanned lunch.  So i headed to the shower.

I had just gotten good and settled in under the water, it had been approximately 60 seconds since my entry point (i kid you not) when in burst Jordan and Skyler to ask me some questions.  So here i stand, in my shower, that I've been in all of 60 seconds (did i mention it is just a clear door) with my two daughters who I've been sitting across from for 3 hours asking me questions.  "Really?"  So i sent them out and settled back in the water only to hear Gracie burst in the door, "Mom, what was the place called where the US dropped... "Really? Get Out!"

So for the third time i settled back in under the warm water only to have one of those God moments wash all over me.  You know those, kinda like i had just had with my girls, when God speaks over me with the same thing that just came out of my mouth, "Really LeAnn?"

See in my time with the Lord, just moments before, i had read through a devotion in Oswald's My Utmost for His Highest and had been journaling my thoughts about it.  Here is what it said:
"The entire human race was created to glorify God and to enjoy Him forever.  Sin has diverted the human race onto another course, but it has not altered God's purpose to the slightest degree.  We must continually keep our soul open to the fact of God's creative purpose, and never confuse or cloud it with our own intentions.  If we do, God will have to force our intentions aside no matter how much it may hurt."

You may say i don't get it, so what's the big deal.  Which i would have liked to rationalize the question as well, but i felt Him waiting for me to answer.  And i know it to be big deal.  So... with that in mind, here is what i have learned along this journey;  that EVERY CHOICE i make, big and small hold great significance.  See God and i have been working through the fact that i need to learn to love WELL, ok is just not cutting it anymore, especially in light of the path we have been put on.  And part of that learning process has been making myself available at the moment someone needs me, not just when i feel like it or when it is convenient, or if /or when it works into my schedule. 

What would 5 minutes hurt to stop and answer what they felt important enough to burst in to tell me? Well if i were down right honest and truthful... nothing more than my selfishness, my agenda!    I can really get caught up in my schedule or where we need to be or what we need to be doing and forget the whole concept of people over tasks :)

His question pierced my heart yet again.  See God has been breaking me down at the kneecaps, and as weird as it sounds it has been an awesome experience.  He has been hoarding in on my intentions and showing me His.  He has been breaking in on my plans to show me His.  He has been reminding me again and again that my life is to bring Him Glory in all situations... first and foremost in my home.  He has been humbling me and tearing down strongholds that i have allowed to take root.  He has been reminding me of the undeserved gift my children are to me.  He has been teaching me that normal is overrated and that truthfully not much fun either.  And that safe... well it's a snoozer.  I could go on and on...  but i think you get the point.

So just as plain as i felt the water wash over me, i felt His presence as well waiting for my response...
it was both humbling and exhilarating all at the same time... and all i could say is: "NOT MY WILL MY LORD BUT YOURS BE DONE".  I am so thankful that i serve a God that will not give up on me in my brokenness, sinfulness or selfishness.  No matter how much it hurts i am so thankful that He will force my intentions aside and replace them with His!  Really?  Absolutely!

Hope to have news about the boys by morning!  Thanks for staying tuned!  LeAnn

Different than what i thought...

Well i had one of those moments today, (kinda like an ah-hah moment) and then i had to force myself to bring every "thought captive and obedient" unto my Lord. It was a struggle to be quite honest.

Everybody had already left for church this am, but three of us. Due to sickness in the family i had chosen to stay behind. I had sat down for a moment and as i did i looked around, and i have to admit this is just not how i envisioned this part of my life.

Honestly i had already drawn the picture book of my life for the next several years and what i was staring into the face of... was not what was in my book. See up until a couple of months ago i thought i was doing a pretty good job of juggling all my balls. My house was always clean with the fuzzy throws folded just right. My kids were in an awesome private school and enjoying it. I was teaching two, sometimes three Bible studies a week. I was exercising atleast three times a week. Our four shit-tzus were always fed and clean. The laundry was typically a load or two from being done. I slept almost 8 hours EVERYNIGHT!! And i was good and dolled up everytime i left the house with accessories to match. As i took in the sights around me this morning i have to say "Wow" what can change in a couple of months.

So with that in mind let's review what my life looks like today. My house is never clean and most days you will find piles of clothes and baby items on my dining room table. My three daughters are homeschooled (and yes only by the grace of God are we making it). Thier school work is covering every square inch of my office and thier trash. I am doing good to make it to each of my Bible studies prepared and dressed, without spit up on my clothes or a child in tow. Exercise, really?? i sneak out and walk as often as i can. Our pups are definitely fed, but being clean is questionable... The laundry pile is just downright funny most days. Last night i was up at 11, 1 and 4, (ha! that was a good night). And i surprised my good friend Chris the other day by showing up with my make up on. ARE YOU KIDDING!!!!!

This is so different than i imagined, but it is my life... every piece of dirty laundry, the sleep in my eyes, the dirty diaper on the counter, and the math sheet to be done, the baby swing in the kitchen (that i thought i'd never see again), the nasty dog bone on my couch yet again and the unmade beds for the third day in a row, it is all mine... allowed and written into my life by the One Above. He alone knows the plan and is calling the plays... i am simply supposed to play my best on the field i've been placed.

So... although i still don't have my boys home like i thought we would and we have had the blessing of unexpected family guests and my house is not at all like it once was... this is where my journey finds me today... simply doing the things God places in front of me. And it feels so right. I am trying in His strength to love the people He is putting in my path WELL, laughing at the chaos i call life today with a gut roll and dancing to His song in my head when no one is looking. A day in the life of the Newsoms!

It is definitely different than what i imagined but it is the ride of a lifetime... His and Mine! LeAnn

Accepting who is in charge...

Well it has been a while since i blogged and as i have before, i apologize. However, this time my delay has been for a totally different reason than before. i'd like to say it is because i am getting our home organized or i am preparing for our departure for Brazil or i am becoming the best chef ever, but none of it would be true. It is because i have been wrestling with the Lord over control strings.

We have been put on hold yet again. And as much as i'd really like to complain before you, i am all out of complaints. I have told the Lord every frustration and hurt through the process and He has faithfully listened and witnessed every tear that has fallen. He has continued to stand beside me and hold me up with every wave that has washed over me. He has whispered reassuring words over me again and again. He has never left my side, yet, i have struggled since our approval on the 2nd to just rest in His timing.

How He revealed my failure to relax in Him is quite humorous... not then but certainly now:) It is worth sharing... Last Friday Jordan took her permit test and passed. So we went for breakfast to celebrate (always love the cute BEFORE pictures)...

After our breakfast she decided it would be a great time to begin her behind the wheel debut (i wish you could see her face)...

At one point she was in panic mode and i was trying to instruct her; not at all as criticism but as a LIFE SAVING point. In her fear and frustration she went into control mode instead of hearing my instructions. For a moment she got lost in what she could see directly ahead and had lost all perspective of any other happenings around her. I spoke firm and clear with the directions that she needed, however she could not heed them (i wish i knew who the man in Walmart parking lot was watching us, i am sure he is still laughing even now).

When i finally got her attention and got her stopped i was incredibly frustrated. As she began to complain, I told her that the premise behind a learners permit is that you are not in control. Someone else has to be in the car with you to guide and direct you. Someone that understands the BIG picture not just the limited one you can see with your eyes. And in my ending crescendo, (as if i hadn't said enough already) i said, 'and i quote', "the sooner you accept that while you have a learners permit you are not in charge, the better it will be."

As we walked into Walmart, those same words that i had just spoken washed over me like a downpour. i could feel God's presence all over the moment. i too had gotten lost the prior week in what i could see with my limited vision and allowed myself to lose perspective. I had forgotten who was in control, who is steering the car and who ultimately knows the bigger plan. Instead of preaching it to my daughter, maybe i need to take my own advice: the sooner i accept that THE LORD IS IN CHARGE, the better it will be.

God knew i would find myself on this battlefield this past week and He prepared me in advance for victory on it if i would surrender to His Lordship. Acceptance is my choice. i'm excited to report that i have once again bended my knee in complete acceptance of the ONLY ONE IN CHARGE! He alone is Worthy!

Thanks for not giving up on me friends, I love you with my whole heart! LeAnn

We are APPROVED!

So we found out this morning that we were approved on Friday! Praise the Lord! i dont' have any more info than that yet. But prayerfully tomorrow we can begin to piece it all together!
Will keep you posted! LeAnn

The end of Summer...

School days usher in the beginning of the close of Summer fun! Homework, activities, school friends and football begin to take over. We wanted one more bash this weekend before the reality of the new school year had taken effect. We swam, we laughed and we ate TONS of chocolate. I wish the boys had been with us... but that wasn't possible (Not this weekend anyway).

For us the end of Summer is exciting because the end of Summer also ushers in the beginning of the end of our adoption process. We are beginning to embark on the final days of waiting. It won't be long now and our boys will be here enjoying lots of new beginnings, days by the pool, lots of laughter and TONS of chocolate. And you know what i know... the wait will have been worth it!

Please pray for the boys first day today of thier new "English school". I know it is scary and wierd for them but oh so good!! We are jazzed about the new possibilities opening up for them and how God is preparing them and us for our reunion.

There is new info coming at us about our "time of wait" that i will share soon, but until i can... i cannot scream loud enough, GOD IS SO FAITHFUL!! LeAnn

What we know today :)

So sorry about my tardiness with updates!! I have thought about it often, but... then life got in the way!

We've been swimming with friends :)













We've been having lunch with friends :)













We've been bagging flour at the Manna House :)

Although it has been crazy, it is still no excuse for not letting you in on the news. The boys have been granted admission into the "English school". Prayerfully, they will begin NEXT WEEK!!

Right now they have set our approval date for the 2nd of September and our Travel appointment date as of the 9th of September. So... i will let you know if that actually happens.

We have 10 days to respond that we accept them (ARE YOU KIDDING, OF COURSE WE DO!) once we've been sent our travel appointment. Then supposedly everything moves quick. So... we will keep praying, believing and walking forward!

Thanks for sticking with us! LeAnn

"Oh you of little faith, why do you doubt?"

In scripture over and over again Jesus spoke to His disciples, as well as others, about thier lack of faith which was evidenced by thier doubting.  Can i just say that is ME and ME and then ME again, that He continues today to speak over. 

It is embarrassing to say, but I can have my date with my daddy in the wee hours of the morning, with my Bible in one hand and my tea in the other, and it be rich in growth.  I can be filled to the brim with Him and arise from my prayer position believing and strong.  I can sing songs of praise to Him as i get ready and adore Him with every breath i have.  And still yet, somehow, someway as the heaviness of the day takes a toll, as the waves continue to pound minute after minute, hour after hour, i find myself douting, wavering, knocked down with my breath gone and my belief teetering.  When i find myself yet here again, it takes me a second to wrap my mind around what has subtly happened, express my repentance for my unbelief and grab hold of the truth i know; 

• that GOD IS GOOD ALL THE TIME
• that HE WILL NOT LEAVE ME NOR FORSAKE ME
• that HE LOVES THESE KIDS OF MINE MORE THAN I DO and
• that HE IS ALWAYS FAITHFUL

So i had just had one of these moments yesterday where i was rehearsing the truth i knew when i got an incredible call that i am overjoyed to share with you my prayer partners. 

Our South American approval date has been set for Friday September 2nd.  They have begun to prepare the boys for thier transfer from South to North America, which obviously includes bridging the communication gap. 

We have been told that the social worker is trying to get a green light on some "intense" English training as well as some cultural exposure for the boys.  So as our journey has faithfully been, we are in the wait yet again for an answer. 

So... the estimation is that we will be on ground within the month of September to reunite our family members here with 2 more of our members who are living (for the moment) there.  However, we are thinking more like October might be a more feasible estimation.  But September would be glorious!!

I cannot begin to imagine thier anxiety over this HUGE change in thier lives.  Please join us in praying over thier preparations.  GOD HAS MOVED INCREDIBLE MOUNTAINS!

Everytime i doubt, it brings a level of embarrassment with it.  This journey has been chalked full of unbelievable, unimaginable and unfathomable God moments!  We have sat on the front row and watched mountains move at the sound of God's voice. 

I wish i could sit across from each of you and share the entire story, but that is not possible today.  But what i will share of the story is that i have learned and can say with the utmost of belief and authority that NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE WITH GOD!!  i've seen it again and again with my own eyes!  it doesn't matter what the world around you says, ALL THAT MATTERS IS WHAT GOD SAYS!

I love you so much my friend, i can feel your prayers!  LeAnn

Life continues to move forward!

I didn't realize how long it has been since i updated, so sorry.  I went back today and read through some of my previous blogs.  One particular one caught my attention, it is dated Saturday June 11 entitled "it won't be long now...".  I got a great chuckle out of it as i read it. At the time we really believed by the way things were going that we would be on the ground by the end of July, well i guess you have it figured out along with us, THAT DIDN"T HAPPEN!

Wow at the difference 2 months can make.  God has and continues to humble me with how little i really know.  He continues to show me how Big He is and how small i am.  He continues to grow me a little more everyday.  He continues to break my heart for what breaks His.  He continues to change my perspective and break me of my selfishness a little more everyday. 

See to be quite honest somewhere in the beginning of this process as i wrapped my mind around the addition of 2 family members i had some really self absorbed shallow thoughts of how things were going to change and sacrifices were going to have to be made.  Then as God allowed us to view the next part of the plan, 2 more additional family members, i had some REAL SELFISH struggles going on.  i really wanted to be obedient, but if i were completly TRUTHFUL... only until it hurt. 

See i was trying to figure out how i could obey God with my life, while all the while really not changing anything.  i had agreed to God's plan and was excited about the adventure of it, yet in my heart i really didn't want to make any substantial changes to me or my family.  And honestly as i've looked back over my life, and read again through the stories in scripture, i don't believe that is God's way.  i believe, and see it evidenced all throughout "HIS story", a step of radical obedience often ushers in radical change.

What God has commanded of our family requires major change and i REALLY only wanted to do the minor ones.  So... somewhere over the past few months as i've faced off with God (on more than one occasion) over my stubborness, He began to melt the barriers i had built around our fortress.  As i bowed low before Him, He began to put it all in perspective for me.  WHO HE IS and who i am.  How little i understand about the big picture and how HE HAS IT ALL UNDER CONTROL.

I no longer require the things i once required, or even want the things i once thought important.  i no longer think with the same thought processes i once thought with.  i'm no where near the same person i was just months ago, PRAISE THE LORD!  And... i've had to endure a hard painful lesson along the way; change can be unnerving for those around you.

God gave His all for me and He deserves no less in return.  So... where i got off thinking obedience was a sacrifice... is so sad.  Obedience is a gift of gratitude and thanksgiving i can give back to my King.  NOTHING is too much for the one who GAVE IT ALL for me.So with new perspective life continues to move forward. 


Now with all that said, here is our update:  we have no idea IF OR WHEN God will unite us with our newest family members BUT... what we do know is that we will continue to worship and believe Him.  We have no new information on our process, so we will choose today to lean hard into God for continued perseverance and endurance through a long time of wait :)  

Thank you so much for keeping us in your prayers as we live, love and learn!   LeAnn

FYI:  God in all His goodness kept us busy on Friday (the day of our "supposed approval") with an incredible celebration of yet another birthday!  Skyler turned 12!  So in wild Newsom style we played at Six Flags for 2 days and of course ended with a breakfast at Little Rosies!  We are SO BLESSED!